lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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