Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I fill condoms, not promises.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Randomize
