I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
Randomize
