The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Randomize
