Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
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