So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
