Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
