I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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