You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
