Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
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