We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I text the word "masturbation" so much, all it only takes my iPhone to auto-spell it is for me to type "mas".
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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