The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
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