I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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