i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
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