He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
