quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Mom said you looked used
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
