if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
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