their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
