oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
