Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Randomize
