The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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