I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Randomize
