just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Randomize
