Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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