Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize