your thong is hanging out like whoa
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
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