Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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