i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
We were destined to go to rehab together
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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