that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
