He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
