Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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