ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
