I think I am morally bankrupt
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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