hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize