Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
