i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Randomize
