Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
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