Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize