dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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