If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
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