he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
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