Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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