it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
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