I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
