you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
