so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I just want to dump glitter on my floor and roll in it like a cat in catnip.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
