hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
