i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
