i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I could fuck to npr.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
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