I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I wear drunk well.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize
