are you so shy because you have an std?
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
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