What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
fuck your aforementioned shoe
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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